A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
