Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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