i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
