Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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