it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Randomize