somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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