Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
