are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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