i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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