garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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