Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
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