..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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