Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Randomize
