She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
