Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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