is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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