So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
