we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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