that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Randomize
