YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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