I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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