Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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