I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
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I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
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Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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