Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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