I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
