hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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