please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
