I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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