hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Randomize
