The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
