The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
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