i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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