Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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