i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
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