We're facebook friends in real life
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
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