Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
