I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Randomize
