We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Randomize
