whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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