Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize