I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
Randomize
