I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
