She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I am midnight drunk by noon
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Randomize