u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
