Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
