yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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