Do you still have your period?
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
