Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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