Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
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