my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
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